'Graeme Dear's address at the late John Lister's funeral'

Jackie, Naomi, Andrew, Rowena, Mrs Lister, Minister, Friends and Colleagues of John

It is an honour for me to stand here and try to reflect on John’s life as we who worked with him knew it. I am grateful to those among the audience and those colleagues from around the world, especially Chile, who have contributed thoughts, memories and of course reminiscences of John and the phenomenal impact that he had upon many of our lives.

John was, to many, a bit of an enigma. The consummate professional Finance Director – a man of the utmost integrity, highly intelligent, articulate, extraordinarily competent – a true master in his field.

I recall my first encounter and yes I put him in the straight laced, a-humorous (if there’s such a word) pin striped suited financial man deposit box. But over time, as we worked more and more closely together, I found a different, multi-faceted John. I can best liken it to a visit to the bank vault. First impressions being of efficiency and order, but with many boxes waiting to be unlocked, within which lay undiscovered treasures. But only John would decide if a box should be opened for you.

My first visit to his office, lots of papers (he knew where everything was) – quite austere and proper but as I left, a wee box opened, because there, on his cabinet, were his collection of family photographs – John a loving, caring family man. I thought I was too - but when I returned to my office, I had none of my own. John, almost subliminally, showed me work is work but family is life. We subsequently spent a number of enjoyable coffees discussing our kids’ achievements for example show jumping (I hate horses) and golf tournaments (John hates golf) – but we reveled in the success achieved.

From another box John taught me, and others, the value of knowing your limits. You can’t know everything, the skill, and he had oodles of it, was to know how and when to recognize it and what to do about it. He knew when to invest in professional advice and the business benefited immensely from that counsel and wisdom. A few have come to grief because they underestimated John’s abilities and approach to managing business conflicts.

It will come as a surprise to no one that the box containing loyalty was a special box. John’s loyalty to the business in all its turmoil and successes was enormous. But, even greater than that was his loyalty to his colleagues, and especially those in his team. There are many here and abroad who recognize this quality and I can best sum that up, not in my words but in those that I have received from his colleagues:

· He saw something in me that I did not see in myself, he gave me opportunities I would have been too scared to ask for, he then gave me the space and trust to see the job through.
· I always knew he was there, upstairs in Craigcrook, with his incredible knowledge, patience and professionalism.
· My memories of John will be of an amazing role model
· The Rios family are eternally grateful to John for giving them the opportunity to live and work in Scotland
· Jorge Rios recalled - one of my fondest memories of John was how pleased he was to see the back of me after I returned from Wembley Stadium after watching Chile beat England 2 - 0 but he took the result in good spirit
· There was nothing worse than feeling that you had disappointed John and his praise was consequently greatly prized.
· If a mistake was made to the outside world it was "our" mistake no names would ever be mentioned and no blame was laid at one persons door.
· The standards he set are the same standards which I work to today.
· When we heard of John's illness it was amazing how many people had stories of how quietly John had had a word with them during their difficult times and his great strength had been a comfort to them
· I only hope that Jackie can know that many people around the world have lots to be grateful for meeting John (Gabriel’s own words).

One day, John decided to open another box, his 'Yes Minister' or wordsmithery box. I was treated to the delights of perspicacity and obfuscation amongst others – I still don’t believe him that they were everyday Yorkshire words. But he had me in stitches on a number of occasions as he slipped them into debates and discussions and we watched the look of despair on the faces of those who struggled not to show they didn’t have a clue what he was talking about. To our Dutch colleagues, and I know coz they told me, his language skills must have seemed perplexing.

And so we start to open that box for which he was famous – the humour box, the dry wit, the one liner, and a number of us recall his particular joy with the strategically planned fun at the expense of auditors, particularly Unilever internal auditors. Invariably they were bright young things, making a way for themselves in the Unilever accounting fraternity, and never known for their overwhelming modesty!

John looked forward with (what for John was) eager anticipation for their arrival and particularly to the debrief from the team leader on the Friday morning. For it was then that John found out which of the unimportant little problems he had cleverly placed within the accounting systems and routines, they had spotted, and which of his traps they had fallen into. This served four purposes a) it made the team leader feel that his group had done a great job in identifying the irregularities b) it provided John with a pre-planned battle on the ground of his choosing c) it kept them away from anything that might have been controversial and d) gave him much (well concealed) joy and satisfaction which he would then share with his colleagues.

It was with a certain irony, but not surprise to those who knew him, that he became a well respected auditor for Nutreco, just as he was an outstanding FD for MH.

Finally, I cannot avoid the most famous of all John Lister trademarks – the Lister…………… Pause. The drawn out silence usually when someone asked him a question. Geared to enable him time to think, for you to dig a deeper hole for yourself or to unsettle or test the embarrassment factor of his verbal opponent. Some colleagues were never sure whether he had momentarily gone to sleep, was bored rigid by the conversation or just thought the question so inane that it didn't deserve an immediate reply. And he would play it for all his worth. In time one learned there was only one defence – look at him quizzically and see him out – it was like a game of poker. We used to enjoy seeing just how long he would stretch a silence out for. I do recall however, travelling through Edinburgh on a day off with my wife and 8 year old daughter in the car, John called me and midway through he hit me with a pause to which my daughter piped up half-way through it – has he finished yet? The sweet innocence of a child defeated him when grown men had crumbled!

We now have to endure the longest Lister pause possible – but in our hearts and memories, as we recall John, it will be the same length as all the others.

Jackie and family – we are all proud to have worked with John and will be eternally grateful for having had the opportunity to share part of John with you. Wherever he is – may he find peace.

Friends and Colleagues of John